| Gonna keep on tryin til I reach the highest ground! |
[17 Mar 2007|05:57pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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Stevie Wonder - Higher ground |
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Haven't used this thing.....since the last time I used it. Since no one reads them anymore I don't feel completely ridiculous writing in it.
I realized...... I hate relationships. Granted the fact one day I want to get married and have children, but I'm not going to start working on that now. I'm too young, I don't need the aggravation, stress and obligations. I'm happy being free now. Not only that but I got stuck. I was stuck in an unhealthy relationship for too long and just couldn't escape, how can you escape? Why can't you, even though you know it's the best thing for you? Well, I realized after I did it, its because I was scared, scared of being alone..... I had no one around but that person to keep me company, to laugh with, to fight with. I was scared of what my life would be like without that persons phone calls or hugs, without that persons voice. It's hard, because I don't want to be alone and although friends say they will be there......they never are. It's hard because you wonder how the person feels. It's hard because you're trying to be strong yet no one is helping you. But I realized I would rather be alone than continue the relationship because I know I'm strong enough, and it's not fair for that other person to truly care while you drag them along because you don't want to be alone. I would rather be alone drowning in my own pity LMAO!!!! ok now this is ridiculous. I need to get my pimp back..... On to the next.......
I hope to get a job during July, save all my money and take a trip to Europe this summer. I need adventure, I need something new. Anyway........
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